Solo retreat for women: where to go and how to prepare

Going on retreat alone: the short answer

Yes, a woman can go alone on retreat to a monastery. It is in fact the most common form of retreat: you come on your own, stay in the guesthouse and organise your time as you wish, joining the community's prayer if you want to.

The vast majority of RITRIT partner places welcome women on their own.

Why go alone?

The reasons are as varied as the people: catching your breath after a busy period, going through a bereavement or a separation, making a decision, coming back to prayer, or simply spending a few days without having to look after anyone.

Going alone does not mean being isolated. The community is there, a sister or brother guestmaster welcomes you, and meals are shared with the other guests. Each woman chooses the balance of silence and conversation that suits her.

With nuns, sisters or monks?

• Women's communities: nuns (Benedictines, Cistercians, Carmelites, Poor Clares) who lead a contemplative life, or sisters from congregations more oriented towards hospitality. Many retreatants feel at ease there for a first time.
• Men's communities: many also welcome women in their guesthouse, but not all, and conditions vary from one place to another.
• Mixed communities: some communities bring together brothers and sisters, who share prayer and hospitality.

On the map of places, the "Who for?" filter, "Women" option, shows only the places that welcome women on their own.

What is the stay like?

You stay in a single room in the guesthouse. The day follows the rhythm of the offices: you can attend them or not. In between, you read, walk, rest. Meals are often eaten in silence.

If you wish, you can ask to talk with a sister, a monk or a priest, once or every day. This is called a guided retreat, one of the forms of spiritual retreat offered in monasteries.

A few tips before you go

• Check how to get there: many monasteries are in the countryside. Find out the nearest station and how to reach the place before booking.
• Let your loved ones know: give them the name of the place and your dates, then switch off your phone if you can.
• Pack light: simple clothes, good shoes and a notebook are enough.
• Stay at least two nights: the first day is often spent slowing down.

Frequently asked questions

Can a woman go to a men's monastery?

Often yes, in the guesthouse. Some men's communities, however, only welcome men. Each place's page on RITRIT states who it welcomes.

Do you need to be a believer?

No. Communities welcome everyone who respects the quiet of the place, believer or not.

How long should you go for?

Most places welcome guests for 1 to 7 nights. Two or three nights are enough for a first retreat.

Are there retreats just for women?

Some communities organise preached retreats on set dates, sometimes for a specific audience.

How do you book?

On RITRIT: choose a place and your dates, then send your request to the community. As for costs, most ask for a freewill offering, according to your means.

Five women's monasteries that welcome you

• Jouarre Abbey, in Seine-et-Marne, with Benedictine nuns, 70 km east of Paris (Île-de-France region);
• Blauvac Abbey, in the Vaucluse, with Cistercian nuns, at the foot of Mont Ventoux (Provence-Alpes-Côte d'Azur region);
• Échourgnac Abbey, in the Dordogne, with Cistercian nuns, in the heart of a forest (Nouvelle-Aquitaine region);
• La Coudre Abbey, in Laval, with some forty Trappist nuns (Pays de la Loire region);
• Val d'Igny Abbey, in the Marne, with Cistercian nuns (Grand Est region).

For each region, our destination pages present the monasteries that welcome retreatants.